the perpetual dieter

Like any female in her late 20's who is holding onto some extra weight, I am always looking for the latest and greatest diet.  A get thin quick scheme will always spark my attention.  Since starting college, I've been trying to lose weight.  That is over ten years of 'dieting' while also gaining weight over time.  Diets are the worst.  I've tried diet pills, atkins, south beach, the 17-day diet, protein shakes, weight watchers, crash diets, juicing all meals, weight watcher again (but stricter this time).  I have never been a big fast food person.  I pretty much love vegetables with every meal, and I don't think I've tried a fruit that I don't like.  I've been a "dressing on the side," "non-fat, sugar free vanilla, half-caf" kinda gal for a while and its really not changing anything.

I am so sick of feeling fat.  Have you ever been in a room with a group of your girlfriends and realized - I'm the fattest one in here.  I have.  Plenty of times.  It's annoying to see them eating what they want, exercising if they feel like it and they never gain an ounce.  Actually, the more that I think about it... a couple of my good friends have lost weight in the last year or so.  I wish I landed in the lucky gene pool of small frames and thin legs.  However, I did not.  I am not obese by any means, I am just not skinny.  I fall somewhere in the middle with the "too embarrassed to figure out my actual pants size so I will only wear stretchy pants and loose shirts" group.  

I found a pair of pants that I wore to the job I had when I was 22.  6 year old pants.  I fought with myself about trying them on, and when I did... they fit me just fine.  So... I've always been fat?  Or maybe I need to stop looking at myself in the mirror so much and start being more positive about myself.  Sure that's it.  Be more positive. 

I will take control of one aspect of my life, starting now.  In early February, Ryan realized that his work offered gym membership discounts.  He joined and told me that this place wasn't the huge overwhelming type of gym, but more of a small and inviting place.  For the price of a take out lunch, I would be able to join too (seriously, $12 per month!) and we got ourselves into a nice little routine.  I evaluated what my typical day of food looked like and figured out where I needed to cut back: 

• Coffee with flavored creamer turned into coffee with skim milk and sugar free syrup.
• Greek Yogurt for breakfast and Cottage Cheese with crackers for snack turned into a protein meal replacement shake for breakfast.
• Lean Cuisine lunch with a side celery and hummus, crackers of some sort and an apple snack switched to Lean Cuisine, celery, apple and grapes.
• 3:00 sugar craving to the office candy bowl is now 2 clementines.
• 5:15 carb attack used to be anything in sight - chips, candy, crackers and dip didn't matter... needed something before I made dinner.  With the addition of my breakfast shakes, I haven't really had these cravings.
• Dinner usually varied: Chicken breast with rice or pasta, a frozen veggie steamer and salad.  Now I make the same thing but with small changes... half a chicken breast, one actual serving of rice or pasta (that about 1/2 a cup), as many veggies as I can fit on the plate, plus my salad bowl is now a small mixing bowl.  I eliminated my caloric-heavy dressing for balsamic vinegar and drastically reduced the amount of bleu cheese crumbles (girl's gotta have her cheese!)

Now, these are just a few small steps that I made in my daily life to making the healthier choices.  It was actually easy.  I still allow myself to have crackers or whatever I want, just in moderation.  Sweet tooth Sally is still getting her daily candy intake - just not 3 packets of fun-size peanut m&ms from the office candy bowl or what ever we have at home by the handful. 

With these small diet changes and regularly going to the gym I was starting to feel a little better about myself.  I read a lot of different tips on how to lose overall fat, and the option I wanted to try the most was weight lifting.  "I don't want to get huge!" There is no way I am going to go from overall softy to bodybuilder overnight, or even in a year!  So, we met at the gym 4 or 5 days per week, put in our head phones and pumped iron.  

I am standing up in one of my best friend's wedding this May.  I am not going to be the fattest bridesmaid.  I wanted to focus on the areas that would be seen the most: jiggle arms and back muffin top, as it is a tight strapless dress.  After only a couple of weeks of regularly lifting weights, I was able to lift more and I could see changes in my body.  I love that little line of definition on my biceps.  I love that my shirt sleeves are less tight and uncomfortable.  I am starting to gain a little confidence. Keep it up kid...